The magical moment of love is known as love at first sight. When talking about falling in love at first sight, some questions cannot be avoided. What is the risk of falling in love with the wrong person? How long does it take us to recognize the right person? Why can deep love in a short period of time turn into repulsion and even hatred? And above all - Is there really eternal love?
There are still scientists, psychologists and sociologists who give an affirmative answer, with certain assumptions. This means: falling in love at first sight - YES, and whether it will develop into love depends on a whole series of factors. Namely, love does not fall from the sky, it is not an unconditional state of the soul, but a product of time and effort that both partners invest in their relationship.
One often hears the comment that someone fell in love with the wrong person. Does this inevitably mean trouble? Psychologists have a philosophical position on this issue and say that no one falls in love with the wrong person, because instinct cannot be deceived. The famous butterflies, which float in the stomach of people in love, appear only when we run into a person who is just right for us. And it is not true that love makes a man blind. There is scientific evidence that supports the fact that people see most clearly at the very beginning of the birth of love, when the famous arrow hits them in the middle of the heart. During the first minutes of falling in love, one hundred percent recognizes the "opposite side". In that magical moment, although we are not aware of it, we learn everything about each other: the past, childhood, failed relationships, fears, soul injuries, courage and strength, hopes and weaknesses, plans and dreams.
Love at first sight and falling in love
You will surely say that people cannot get to know each other, let alone fall in love, in just a few minutes. However, experts say, it is possible. In 90% of cases, this happens consciously, intuitively. In fact, we are not even aware of how many signals we emit to each other: appearance, clothes, smell, gestures, body language, voice, then what radiates from the inside and many other small details that reveal a person. From all this, the subconscious creates an overall picture. The more the partner's qualities activate our senses in a positive direction, the stronger the mutual attraction. In addition, it has been proven that a man or woman always falls in love with those personalities whose overall structure complements their own personality.
The logical conclusion in that case is that all love relationships should be harmonious and happy. But the perfect complement of the personality does not automatically imply peace and joy of the soul, but above all the chance to optimally develop one's personality together with another being. Old wounds, feelings of guilt and fears should be "processed" and all our potentials should be released. Given that these processes are usually very laborious and painful, in order to be successfully mastered, it is necessary to have a great mutual compatibility and attraction. Only then will two beings be ready to engage intensively with each other.
And what happens later?
In the first phase of falling in love, while they are still floating in the seventh heaven, they will build a solid base for future togetherness. And that togetherness depends on the strength that couples invest in care and attention, without which love withers and even dies.
It is true that after three to four years the intense feeling of being in love subsides. If the couple has not established a strong psychological bond by then, slowly but surely alienation occurs. Day by day, man and woman become more and more strangers. Both of them wonder if the person they wake up next to is the same one they fell madly in love with, and that at first sight. It's as if they don't recognize each other anymore, because they didn't make an effort to really get to know each other, to preserve closeness and respect.
Contrary to many psychologists, who have a whole range of justifications for alienation between people, there are also those who give the opposite interpretation. They claim that saturation, which inevitably occurs with age, is not a natural consequence, it is not a question of age or the time that the partners have spent together, but rather a question of the quality of life together.
Because eroticism and the joy of life are often suffocated by banal everyday struggles. They are soon replaced by silence and anxiety. That's why an honest conversation is the last chance to fix things. Honesty, no matter how hard it fell, is the only chance to recover and rekindle closeness and love, without which life is meaningless.
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